There's a reason for that, you know?

There is a man at my gym, whom I like to refer to as "Sweaty McGee," who commits a cardinal gym sin everytime he works out. Now, 24 Hour Fitness requires that each member bring in a towel every time they work out...a rule that I firmly believe in and a rule that Sweaty follows. Oh yes, he carries that towel around like a shield...like a badge of honor...unfortunately, he never uses it. I watch him as he leans back into the machines, trying to get the perfect leverage, with that towel draped across his knee. As he stands up, he proudly throws the towel around his neck and moves on to the next machine. What he doesn't seem to realize is that he has left his mark on the previous machine. I'm not talking about a glistening spot, I am talking about a full on puddle beginning where the crown of his head was that drips all the way down to the seat. As the unoffical "butt of all of God's jokes," it is of course my fate to always be the next in line for his machine. I can't use my towel to wipe off his sweat, and I certainly can't lean into it and use it as a moisturizer...I have had to change around my entire workout. I'm often tempted to grab that towel from his hands and use it in the way that old duelists used to use their gloves; slapping it across his cheeks and throwing it to the floor, but alas I stay silent and move on to the free weights thinking, "I'll just come in earlier tomorrow."